Rosie instructed me to photoshop Misha and Marianna into our family photo. This is going on the introduction letter we send for the kids to read at the airport, before they get on the flight to America.
Rosie is so excited, she can barely contain herself. Lots of planning, speculation, and general kid-like bouncing off the walls with anticipation!
She’s been spending hours learning more Ukrainian words, and she’s just about mastered writing their alphabet. This is a sign she made for the kids.
I’ve been taking some time to read in depth information on parenting kids from hard places. Right now I’m reading The Connected Child. I’ve had so many Aha! moments. I wish I’d read this book three hosting experiences ago.
Not only am I finding the info helpful for loving on the host kids, it’s also working extremely well with my own children. A lot of it applies to parenting in general, even though it’s geared towards children who have experienced trauma.
The whole premise of the book is striving to teach children respect and appropriate behavior while still maintaining and growing an attached bond with them. The book explains how bribes, punishments, and coercion break this bond and instead shows you how to build a trusting relationship with your child from the ground up. There is no tolerance for out of control behavior, and unlike other parenting books I’ve read this one actually teaches you exactly how you can respond in multiple types of situations.
So I’ve started trying it out on Ada.
Holy crap. It works so well. The best part is I feel like I have things under control rather than grasping at straws in a frantic attempt to manage all of the four year old blow ups that occur with my intense kiddo.
The book explains how behaviors stem from needs, and how you can redirect the child to learn how to manage their own behavior by using words to ask for what they need rather than just going crazy. It also gives a lot of insight into body language and how that impacts everything.
I’m over simplifying it.
Anyway, if you’re having parenting troubles I highly recommend it. This is the website–there are lots of videos too.
I’m going to read Parenting the Hurt Child next.
Collecting wealths of info in my brain over here!