T-Minus Ten Days!
Only ten days until Vladik arrives.
Can you believe that?! Time is going by so quickly.
I am very, very excited to meet him. I’m also a little nervous because this is the first child we’ve hosted who is actually in the process of being available for adoption.
What if we love him?
It’s scary to think of all the money the adoption process requires. I wish it could be free. Of course that’s not the way the world works. ;)
This hosting organization is so upfront with all of their information. Other groups in the past have told us absolutely nothing. This group works so closely with Vlad’s orphanage director, they are very much on the same team.
Remember how hard we had to work to get any accurate information about Igor’s situation, and how it took years to find out anything!? Yet we know everything they know about Vladik already, before even meeting him.
His mom’s parental rights are in the process of being terminated. I’m awaiting an update on where he’s at in the process. Ukraine moves pretty slowly.
Igor idolizes his mother, even though she’s definitely not good for him. She’s abusive, manipulative, can’t or won’t care for him properly, and allows his older siblings to steal from him and get him drunk on a regular basis.
But Vladik? They tell me he dislikes his mother. He wants nothing to do with her. The times in the past she’s come to the orphanage to visit or to take Vladik out for a holiday Vlad hasn’t wanted to go with her.
This is both sad and good. Vladik doesn’t have divided loyalties like Igor does, which makes things more straightforward when it comes to bonding. However there’s also heartbreak involved. No one comes into state care anywhere without being traumatized and hurt.
Vladik’s mother was drunk all the time. She neglected him to the point of his removal. His earliest childhood memories are likely of abuse, hunger, and neglect.
Childhood trauma causes the brain to form differently. It’s a documented scientific fact. On top of that Vladik likely has fetal alcohol syndrome thanks to his mother’s alcoholism. Early malnutrition combined with the effects of FAS have made Vladik a tiny guy. Last winter he was wearing size 5t clothing and he’s 8 years old. (Henry is 2.5 and wears 4t!!)
After hosting so many kids with major issues I think it’s pretty safe to say we are not easily intimidated and we’re well prepared for the challenge. Not only that but we have just completed hours of intense training on trauma in children for our foster care license.
And if we do adopt? Columbus has so many resources to help care for children like Vladik!
Anyway, I am so very excited to meet this little boy and find out how he fits into our family and to get to know him. Our hearts ache for Igor–each of my children ask about Igor daily.
We’re ready for something new. New memories, a new little person to love.
Vladik is also very excited about coming to America. He knows he’s coming to our family, but he won’t know any details about us specifically until he receives our welcome letter on his way to the airport.